Thursday, September 25, 2008

forever

This post started out to NOT be about our Heather (but then, it veered right back to Heather. What can I say? Surely soon I'll be able to blog about something else, right? In the meantime, if you get tired of Heather stories, you can take a break from reading here for a couple of weeks and I won't blame you). The fact is, I just can't get enough of her. I'm more and more amazed (and a little frightened) every day that Eric and I have been entrusted with her care and upbringing. I wake up every morning just thrilled (although a little tired) to discover that she is still living here, that she's actually ours and doesn't belong to anyone else.

Last night, I was thinking about the fact that my mom is leaving tomorrow, and Eric and I will be much more on our own than we are now. I got thinking about the many many times that I have driven out of Cedar City with tears in my eyes and a sob in my throat as I left my dearest siblings, parents, and nieces and nephews. I'm a sentimental person anyway, and leaving those dear ones to travel back to my home here was at times was nearly more than I could bear.

Since Eric and I married, parting with my family has been much easier. Oh, I still miss them, and I still get terribly excited at the prospect of being with them, but now that my Eric either 1)comes and leaves with me or 2)is waiting at our home for me to return; leaving the family isn't as difficult. And why should it be? Eric is my best friend. He's my favorite, and I'm his favorite. Silly as that may seem, it's immensely comforting to me.

So anyway, last night I got thinking about all of that, and I realized that Heather isn't an adorable little niece of mine, or a cute neighbor girl, or the darling little Sunbeam that waves to me every week in Primary. Heather is my daughter.

She is mine.

She is mine, and when my mom goes home tomorrow, Heather will stay here with me. I don't have to leave her when Christmas or Thanksgiving or a family reunion or whatever-other-special-occasion-that-might-occur is over. She will live with Eric and I for years and years to come, and I will be able to see her pretty much every day for the next I-don't-know-how-many-years. What's more, by virtue of the temple sealing in which Eric and I participated when we got married, Heather is mine forever.

It seems pretty basic, doesn't it? I mean, duh! But, realizing that last night just swelled my heart with joy.

So, I can say goodbye to my mother for now. I'm sure I'll miss her-I'll miss having her here so I can ask her all my nervous new-mother questions, but that's what a telephone is for, right? I'll miss our laundry and dishes magically washing themselves as they have for the past week, and the housecleaning elves that have been in residence here (even to the point of cleaning our nasty nasty oven), but it will be good for me to get back into the swing of all that, and to start gaining the practice of balancing and priority-setting, right? Mostly I'll miss laughing with her and swapping stories with her and running errands with her. She's one of my best friends, and I love the time I spend with her.

And why shouldn't I? I'm her daughter.

I am hers.

What's more, by virtue of the temple sealing in which she and my father participated when they got married, I'm hers forever.


Yup, Forever.


9 comments:

Bamamoma said...

Awesome. I almost called you tonight but I decided to wait until your mom is gone - I don't want to use up her time. I'll probably not call over the weekend because I don't want to use up Eric's time either. Come Monday though...

I hope all is well!

Jake said...

I very much enjoy wow moments such as this one (though since I'm a man I can't allow myself to share all of them except to Melissa). I, for one, enjoy hearing about Heather and all your new experiences with her..

Jeri said...

If we only hear "Heather stories" for a "couple more weeks," then I will seriously think there is something WRONG with you as a mother! 90% (or more) of my posts are child related. HELLO! Those of us who love your blog love it because it lets us be a part of your life. And from now until FOREVER, Heather is a HUMONGO part of that life! I've been waiting a long time (though not as long as you) to hear these stories from you. send them our way!

I love your mom - she is so great! the picture of her with Heather?... that is one pretty baby! She is gorgeous. I'm ready to take a road trip so I can hold her!

Charlotte said...

Jeri,

The road awaits. You're welcome anytime.

:)

-char

THE RHOADES said...

Hey Charlotte. I got your email about your new little arrival and to check out your blog! I couldn't pass that up! I love "blog stalking" especially of family members I never see... you Corry side of the fam! This is Andrea Rhoades (Vielstich's daughter) I just have to say, you're little Heather is beautiful! Congratulations to you and Eric!

Nellie and Jason said...

Oh my gosh, I loved this post, it made me cry!!
The mother-daughter bond is an awesome thing.

Nellie and Jason said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Mary Ann said...

I love, love, love this post. It is so wonderful to hear your feelings about eternity and your sweet family. She is so cute!

melissa c said...

I absolutely loved this post. How beautiful. You have a talent for writing.

You make me miss my mom so much. Enjoy yours and the beautiful relationship you have with your mom. Life is so fragile. Who knows when it will end?

Thank heavens for temple sealings!

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